Lucie Loves… Life // Losing Wisdom by Roz Brabner

tumblr_ogy5sssd5R1qzipnzo1_1280.jpg
tumblr_ogy5sssd5R1qzipnzo2_1280.jpg

A few weeks ago I had my wisdom tooth drilled out of my face, that same week ended with a letter from HMRC telling me I owe them £322.20.

I’m starting to think adulthood is a bit shit actually.

I’ve not been a massive fan of 2016 so far, but that week really did take the biscuit – which I couldn’t have eaten anyway!

The procedure itself was bearable. Whilst I am certainly not going to rave about having a metal instrument pulling my mouth to one side for 30 minutes, at the same time as a drill cracks away at my third molar, it did give me the chance to revisit my happy place. My happy place is me riding my beautiful pony Brandy cantering in a sunny haze through long grass and buttercups blissfully unaware of the trauma to come in 20 years time. When things got really uncomfortable, I thought about my friend that was being induced. I’m sorry Zoe, but I did think that if you can push a baba out of your vajaja I could get through a tooth extraction. You inspire me.

The dentist told me I was really brave. I was really brave. She gave me a prescription for loads of drugs and off I went, still numb from the local anaesthetic, which I really enjoyed. I kept poking myself on the bus home thinking it was quite miraculous that I couldn’t feel anything. Yes, I did get quite a lot of stares.

It wasn’t until later on in the week that I began to hate the world and everything in life. The swelling commenced pretty rapidly, I went from cheekbones to pancake in a matter of hours and then the pain hit. It hit me like a train. The whole left side of my face was in a constant state of a throbbing relentless dull ache.

Here is an interesting fact for you guys: some people are immune to codeine. Yep, turns out that I am one of those people, BECAUSE WHY WOULD I POSSIBLY WANT FAST AND EFFECTIVE PAIN RELIEF?! The next time someone tells me emotional pain is worse than physical pain I’m going dead-pan. I’m just going to stare them dead in the eye and not blink until they leave.

A few weeks on I am pleased to say my face is back to normal. I was worried it was going to be stuck with a 35% increase to the left side but luckily, it’s true what they say, time really is the best healer. I thought adulthood was all about earning more money, buying expensive cheese and going home earlier, I forgot about the general decay of ones body.

Anyone got Peter Pan’s number?

Like this? Read more posts by Roz Brabner.